Oral Sex Tutorial: The Art of Fellatio 5

how to give a blow jobWritten By: Jenne

Authors note: This guide is not the definitive guide to fellatio as there will never be a guide written that can cover every aspect of the art of cock sucking. Just as all women are different the same is true of men. This guide is merely meant to be just that, a guide. There is no written text that can compensate for having a gentle patient man who is willing to communicate with you as you perform oral sex. What this guide is intended to do, is point you in the right direction…

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Introduction
Ask most men and they will tell you that one of the aspects they most enjoy when it comes to sex is receiving oral. In fact, there are very few men that don’t enjoy the sensations experienced from this very special and intimate act. Why? It’s primarily because the mouth can produce a sucking sensation that the vagina cannot. Giving your lover head should be a gentle mixture of both technique and assessing his response pattern. Use your senses to guide you, listen to the sound of his breathing and channel his energy with each touch. Cock sucking is not something that is learned overnight and one of the most important things a guy can do for a women, especially if it’s her first time, is to be patient and supportive.

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The Basics:
For the boys: A lot of chatter goes around when it comes to the distinctive aroma of a woman’s pussy. The same is equally true when it comes to the male jiggle stick. Taking a bath or shower prior to getting a blowjob ensures that your genitals are clean & hygienic and you will be greatly rewarded by her talented tongue.

Showering can easily be incorporated into oral sex as not only is it exciting to sensually lather each other up, but it’s also a great way to ensure that you’re both comfortable and relaxed – especially important when you intend to do some cock sucking later -)).

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Back to the lesson. Humans have five senses; taste, touch, sight, smell, and hearing – use them. When it comes to giving good head, you should be using at least three of these senses at any given time. Receiving a blowjob is a combination of physical and visual sensations. Many men find a seductive gaze from their partner while performing fellatio highly erotic. Draw on your ears; listen to your partner’s reactions as you touch various areas of his body. Listen to his breathing patterns as you work your way down towards his most prized possession. Feel him jump with anticipation as you softly caress various areas of his body.

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Take your time! Many women think that the quicker they can make a guy come the better. Whilst it’s true that a fair percentage of men enjoy this approach, this is not the best way to give your guy a great orgasm. In actuality, it’s probably the worst way, but as I said a moment ago, some men do enjoy the quick and fast method. The longer that you can keep your partner sexually energized without allowing things to become unexciting, the deeper and harder his orgasm is likely to be.

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A word to the guys here, be patient with your partner. Being able to give good head is very much a learned talent and as such the more expressive you are when your receiving it the better the whole experience will be for both of you. Your partner wants to give you pleasure, help them by showing that’s is exactly what you are receiving. A moan or soft words of encouragement can go a long way when it comes to showing your partner what you like. If she hits a particularly sensitive area then don’t be afraid to tell her.

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Lubrication, lubrication and again I say lubrication. I can’t stress how important that one word is when it comes to giving head. Makes sure your partners cock is well lubricated when you give head. Try this little test and you’ll see why lubrication makes so much difference. Take your finger and rub it with your hand, it might feel okay, but now put that finger in your mouth and cover it in saliva, now rub your hand across it. Feel the difference that saliva makes to the sensations you receive? Now imagine your finger is your partners cock and you’ll have some idea of why lubrication is so important for not only ensuring that your partner does not end up sore but also he has the most pleasurable experience you can give him. It’s a good idea to take a sip of a drink [non-alcoholic] before you start, as this will naturally make your mouth moist.

Another way to add lubrication is to use a shop brought lubrication of some kind. Remember you are going to be putting this in your mouth, so make sure you choose an edible one that is specifically made for the purpose. They also have the advantage of making your partner’s taste more to your liking if this is something that worries you, as they come in a huge variety of flavors.

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Use your hands as well as your mouth. Yes, this is oral sex we are talking about here, but using your hands as well can only add to your experience. Why limit yourself to just using your mouth, tongue, and lips to provide him with pleasure? Your hands can be used in multiple ways and we’ll look at specific techniques a little later.

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Something that many men complain about is that women forget that a cock is a three-dimension object. It has a back, a front and two sides. For most men the underside of their cock [the part that faces their body when flaccid] is by far the most sensitive of the four but often receives the least attention.

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Be Safe: Whether you choose to use condoms when giving oral is a personal choice. It is worth noting however, that brushing your teeth before giving a blowjob is probably not a good idea. This is because the brushing action leaves tiny cuts in your mouth, and although they heal in minutes, it’s something worth considering.

That’s covered the basics, and these points are all worth remembering if you want to give or receive mind blowing fellatio.

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Advanced Techniques:

Variety Is The Spice Of Good Oral: Many people are under the impression that to give good oral all you have to do is suck hard and move your head up and down. Whilst this works with a good number of guys, I have to say this is not the best route to take. Instead, try varying your techniques – but I don’t mean every two seconds. Instead of just pumping for all your worth, slow down and take your time. Enjoy the sensations as his cock jumps to attention. Not only will it feel good for him, you are a lot less likely to end up with jaw ache if you use your hands and tongue as well as your mouth. As one of the guys I interviewed when writing this guide commented:

“Use hands as well! Mouths are very soft and squishy and sometimes some extra firm pressure is nice/needed. When used to slowly stroke the shaft as a tongue plays with the head is very nice (kind of like a blowjob and hand job combined)!”

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Doing The Vacuuming: This technique has nothing to do with housework so stop panicking. Some guys enjoy being sucked really hard whilst others hate it. But it is worth mentioning, as this can be a useful technique when it comes to adding variety to a blowjob. You might like to try sucking hard as you move your mouth up his shaft or alternatively as you move down it. As always, let your partner be your guide and don’t be afraid to try different variations.

“I especially like suction on the penis. The more that is in my lover’s mouth (as much as she can tolerate), the better. Tongue motion during the sucking action helps quite a bit.”

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Fancy Ball Work: To say that all men enjoy football would be a generalization but it appears overall that most men enjoy a little ball playing whilst you perform oral. Girls, ask yourself this: if a guy is giving you oral, do you enjoy it when he reaches up and pays attention to your nipples and breasts? The chances are the answer is yes, so all you are doing is returning the favor when you play with his crown jewels. Just be careful. While his balls can give him great pleasure, too much pressure can have the opposite effect to the one we desire. I thought this comment was rather poignant from another interviewee:

“It is like the whip cream on a piece of chocolate pie. The chocolate pie alone is good; the whip cream makes it just that much better. A little licking, sucking and squeezing in that area is great.”

As a foot note to ball work, it’s worth mentioning that although many men don’t like the thought of having their anus touched, this can be a very sensitive area and one worth exploring with your tongue if you are comfortable doing so. If you’re not comfortable with the idea of licking his anus then try just licking his balls and the surrounding area. This should include the area called the perineum, which runs between his scrotum and his anus. This area of his body is packed with nerve endings and can add greatly to his pleasure.

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Deep-Throating: There are few men that will tell you that having their cock buried down their partner’s throat is not an extremely pleasurable experience. For many women though deep-throating can cause problems, the most serious one being the gag reflex. It is possible to over-come this reflex however, and practice in this case can certainly pay off.

Next time you want to try deep-throating first start by getting a feel for how far you can comfortably take his cock into your mouth without gagging. Then grip his shaft at that point to prevent him thrusting any deeper into your mouth. Each time you give him a blowjob try taking a little more of him into your mouth. Another important part is to try and breath through your nose and not your mouth. This makes life so much easier and you’re less likely to gag.

Guys, be patient! Grabbing her head and yanking it towards your crotch will not get you the results you desire. This is one time when you need to allow your partner to feel in complete control, especially if this is her first attempt. I think the comment below says it all:

“There have been LOTS of discussions on this over the years. I recall reading time and again that when you’re highly excited the gag reflex abates, so why force the issue? – Wait for the right moment, see if it works, and if it doesn’t, so what?”

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Handiwork: Many techniques involve not only using your mouth, but your hands as well. Whilst there is nothing wrong with simply using your mouth, using you hands in conjunction with it can only add to your partner’s pleasure.

The most obvious way to use your hands is simply by caressing your partner. This can either be over their whole body during both foreplay or as you give oral. I’ve listed some techniques below that are worthy of a try.

For this one your partner will need to be really lubricated. Either with your own saliva or with a good shop brought lubricant. To begin, start at the base of his cock and slowly slide your hand towards the tip, whilst you place you’re other hand at the base. Just before you’re first hand reaches the tip start moving your second hand {the one at the base of his shaft] upwards towards his tip, then place your other hand down at the base once more and repeat. Start out slowly and then begin to increase the tempo. This is one of those tricks that is great for getting him from flaccid to fully erect. Of course, the technique can be applied the other way around, IE: starting at the tip, but my advice is only try this when he’s fully erect.

As I mentioned in the deep-throating section, using your hand to stop his cock slipping further down your throat than you desire or can manage is handy as well. Most importantly though, you can use your hands whilst concentrating your oral effort on the spot where most guys are highly sensitive. The spot I’m referring to is where his head meets his shaft, technically known as the corona. Try swirling your tongue around this area as you firmly squeeze his shaft with your hands and watch his reactions. Another great technique is to concentrate your sucking actions only on his head, bobbing your head up and down, so your lips roll over the ridge where his head meets the shaft. Whilst at the same time moving your hands up and down his shaft. This technique takes a little practice but it’s worth the effort, and is great for beginners as it requires only taking a small amount of his cock into your mouth.

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Licking: Imagine your guy’s cock is a flavor of ice cream you adore. It even looks like an ice cream when you think about it. [Use your imagination a little here] Take your ice cream and savor it, lick it, tease bits of it with your tongue and explore its tastes and textures with both your tongue and mouth. Apply lashings of long licks to the shaft area and then grip it firmly with your hands and begin slowly moving your hand up and down. Whilst your doing that begin licking his head, before taking the whole head into your mouth and applying a suction motion while moving up and down. Use your mouth and hands in unison for an exquisite all over effect.

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Spit or Swallow? Many people say this is not a big issue, but the truth is in many cases it can be/is. As with everything else, for many guys it’s not a big deal. But for most it does make a difference. Not even so much in whether you choose to spit or swallow but the manner in which you do it. In other words, there are polite ways to not swallow. It’s similar to being in a restaurant and you find your steak has a little bit of gristle in it. You’re not likely to spit it back out onto your plate out of good manners. Instead, you’ll most likely discreetly place it in a napkin or your hand before disposing of it.

If you don’t want to swallow, then I suggest you either have a napkin or something similar handy. Either that, or you can simply place your tongue in such a position that it acts as a barrier between your mouth and his cum. To do this, place the underside of your tongue over the head of his cock as he’s about to come, and allow it to dribble back down the outside of his already lubricated shaft. You might also consider finishing him with a hand job, but keep your mouth close to him, maybe even rub your cheek along his head, whilst your eyes meet his.

Something worth mentioning here is that the trick to swallowing is often not to taste his semen at all. Although some women enjoy the taste, as mentioned before many don’t. To avoid tasting it when your guy starts to cum the natural reaction is to hold it in your mouth for a moment before swallowing it. This is the only reason you actually taste it. Next time, right after he comes, just try swallowing immediately and hard. Even better, if you can deep-throat, just make him come whilst it’s in the back of your throat. Using both of these techniques means all you will be left with is a vague aftertaste instead of the full monty. The hard swallow technique also feels good to a lot of guys.

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Seismic After shocks: Hopefully your guy has just erupted due to your excellent oral administrations. Most guys will tell you or rather they won’t that it’s great for you to keep up the sucking, moving action whilst they are erupting but once they are spent their head just like your clitoris is inclined to become very sensitive and is best left well alone. As one of the guys I asked put it:

“Keep sucking/licking, during the climax phase (Ejaculation) is great, but when the squirting stops, the head of the penis becomes super sensitive. That is when you should give it a rest for a few minutes, until after the sensitivity subsides.”

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As I said in the introduction to this ‘how to’ there are no rights or wrongs here, only what feels good and comfortable to both you and your partner. Whatever techniques you choose, stay safe and have fun!

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5 thoughts on “Oral Sex Tutorial: The Art of Fellatio

  1. Reply Jan 3,2014 5:03 pm

    Its definitely a case of finding what works for both and then going with the flow!!

    ~Mia~ xx

  2. Reply Jan 27,2014 6:40 am

    An interesting and helpful guide indeed!

    Rebel xox

  3. Reply Neeva Feb 18,2014 10:04 am

    Just as another tip, I find when i lick/suck on his ‘crown jewels’ it helps to also pump his shaft with your hand so that he can be overwelmed by the two different experiences 🙂

  4. Reply sean hugo Jun 9,2014 2:58 am

    very helpful suggestions & ideas.I am a male but i am always interested in the way women masturbate.Or if the like or dislike playing with their privates.How different is her sex drive to masturbate is her’s compared to her male counterpart.

  5. Reply alice watson Aug 9,2015 12:58 am

    I feel as though there wasn’t enough on the scrotum area. I have found that gently (and I mean extremely gently) biting middle area of skin on the scrotum can lead to a very pleasuring reaction. Also on the swallowing if your not familiar with the taste of your partners cum, familiarize yourself. Just for the sake of you may have to taste it a lot.

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